To be aware, or not to be aware?
Self-awareness and becoming your authentic self.
In the age of everyone’s an influencer, a political expert, or an expert on anything for that matter (Google “researchers”), self-awareness and empathy have been replaced with ego and narcissism. Our self-view is distorted by other’s opinions of us, or the number of likes, clicks, or comments is the new measurement of success.
We’ve all seen it, we’ve all experienced it, and yet the gap between authenticity and empathy vs. ego and narcissism widens, creating a cultural and social environment where the loudest, meanest, and toxic people rise to dominance. In contrast, our authenticity becomes overshadowed by our egos to simply try and measure up.
So how do we get back to recognizing authenticity reigns supreme and become more content, grateful, and humble with ourselves?
A steady dose of self-awareness. (or a good kick up the ass, as my mum would say)
Self-awareness and authenticity.
So let’s get back to the basics and first understand self-awareness and why it is important before we theorize where it all went wrong (cough, cough, in a dorm room at Harvard, maybe? Thanks, Zuck.)
self-a·ware·ness: conscious knowledge of one’s own character, feelings, motives, and desires.
Self-awareness is essential to understanding yourself, your behavior, motivations, emotions, reactions, and values. Ultimately, it is the inner mirror to the most intimate parts of yourself. It is about knowing who you truly are. Your emotional DNA.
Remarkably, individuals who take the time to look into that mirror, regardless of how hard or even cracked it is, become more emotionally intelligent, and with that intelligence comes growth. A profound growth that directly impacts your happiness, well-being, and how you interact and influence those around you.
When we know why we think and do the things we do, we then have the ability to decide how we want to think about and do those things going forward. This means stopping or continuing bad or self-destructive behavior or hurting and negatively impacting those we love.
What emerges from this growth and increased self-awareness is the gift of compassion. Compassion with yourself and a deeper sense of empathy with others.
Narcissism and the ego.
Although there are actual mental health conditions related to narcissistic personality disorder, the ever-increasing amount of selfish and self-serving behavior has exponentially increased over the years.
The evil of comparison has consumed our minds and created an endless pursuit of unattainable perfection. We have become enamored by influencers, advertisements, social media, and the next hot thing, and the bi-product is misguided, misinformed, and misunderstood priorities. Our internal values are replaced by how we look, what we wear (I am working on this, so don’t judge me!), where we live, the car we drive, and all the other material things that somehow make us “better” than our neighbors.
We can’t control how others behave, what motivates them, what content they consume, or even their beliefs; we can only control ourselves, our reactions to the world, and how we choose to influence and inspire those around us.
It starts with us. Always.
So stop and ask yourself some hard questions:
What’s controlling you?
How is your ego serving you?
What masks are you wearing?
Are you genuinely satisfied with your life?
Do you live your most authentic self?
Is your behavior aligned with your values? (for that matter, do you even know your values)
Strip yourself of judgment. Be gentle with your heart. Show yourself some compassion. But look into that cracked, dusty mirror and look hard at what you see.
If you don’t recognize the person you see, spend a little time getting to know them.
If you see someone whose values are misaligned and misdirected chart a new course.
No matter how many masks you wear, your inner self remains the same; you need bravery to uncover it." —Dr. Shefali Tsabery, Author, A Radical Awakening
If you see a person, you are proud of. Hold on to that. Embrace it. Protect it. Use it to inspire and motivate you.
We are all on a journey of self-discovery and just trying to do our best. We will make mistakes, choose the wrong paths, and fall down. But our mistakes and our past do not define us.
The power of choice is a beautiful and powerful thing. So choose wisely. Self-awareness, emotional intelligence, compassion, authenticity, empathy, happiness, fulfillment, or……become known as that “guy,” a real A-hole.
Be brave. Make a change.
Follow @amouseboucehlife on the good old Instagram. Promising only to deliver positive content, as we know this world sure needs it.